Happy (old post)

I'm going to stop drafting and start posting. I might go back and post all my drafts, there are quite a few.

I keep typing big long paragraphs of nothing, then backspacing them and writing them again. Life is so weird. It's so wonderful, but it's messed up. It confuses me, which most things do. I think about rules all the time. I think about the way we are made and the way we grow up. I think about the way people are different and I think about what makes people treat people the way they do.

I think happiness is the most important thing in the entire world. Compassion and passion and empathy and understanding and forgiveness and science and art are all important too. But happiness is what drives me. Happiness is what I need.

Everybody wants to be happy, I think.

I'm a really happy person. The other day in drama everyone had to pretend to be someone else in the class and we had to guess who was who, and someone (some AWESOME SOMEONE! haha) said to the girl who was acting out as me:

"You're way too happy.... you're Steph."

Which made me laugh. But that's not saying much, because everything makes me laugh. But I get that a lot. We just our yearbooks this year (which aren't super awesome? ....) and I'm collecting signatures and I've already got a couple saying things like "You're the happiest person I know" "You bright up my life" "Be my wife" haha joking I'm just making those up. But I have got some really nice signatures. and people do tell me I'm a happy person. And, I am.

That's what I was saying earlier. When I said (last post) I have everything I've ever wanted. Because I'm happy. And I think that if you're happy, you're set.

I get sad. I get lonely. But I'm still happy. I know we don't live in a perfect world and I know I haven't finished what I was put here on this planet to do, but even when I wake up on the wrong side of the bed, I always smile. I laugh every day.