Beatrice and Virgil

I'm going to talk about a book, but I guess more generally books in general. Analytically analyzing. haha... never mind.

I've always wanted to be a writer. Since, forever. I love to write. And I love books about writers. Beatrice and Virgil, by Yann Martel, is abut a writer. I mean, yes, it was also about the holocaust, among other things. But for me, it was mainly about a writer. As a writer myself, I love reading about writers.

I read some reviews of the book and it didn't seem to get very good feedback, as far as I dug. Which wasn't very far. I was just astounded by how non-appealing they thought the book was. They said it had no plot, no narrative magic like Life of Pi did. I've never read Life of Pi, but eventually I will. One review said, the whole novel was more of an "elaborate writing exercise".

Is that a bad thing? Really and seriously, what is a novel BESIDES an elaborate writing exercise? Review writers aren't writers, in the sense that a writer is a writer. You know what I'm saying?

I loved Beatrice and Virgil. I'm sure a lot of it went over my head, no doubt. But that's okay. If everyone who read a novel understood everything about it, I wouldn't be writing this. I think good books are books that someone can read and enjoy, and another can read and analyze. A book means something different to every reader who indulges.

I love words. I love them. They are my favourite thing.

If the only thing that makes a good book is narrative magic, then there would only be one type of book. I don't think Beatrice and Virgil was boring at all, sometimes you have to look beyond the simple action and think about why the action that is happening, is happening. Words are powerful, and Yann Martel's novel is powerful.

I felt the need to express my appreciation for it.

You should read it. And then when I write my first book, you should read that too.

Love x 2000 divided by the coefficient of lost love plus the sum of healing divided by reality.

I don't know what it feels like to have your heart broken. I know what it feels like to bite your tongue and regret it, but I've never had someone tell me they love me, then take it back another day.

I avoid that whole situation quite efficiently. But I think I've missed out on a lot. I truly believe that the only way any of us will ever learn, is if we completely throw ourselves into something. Loose your footing, forget your purpose, forget what used to matter, fall in love!

I focus so hard on letting myself feel just enough that if that person was to suddenly change their mind and pull away from me, the damage would be minimal. It's awful. I have to constantly watch myself.

I envy those who fall, really truly, with the snap of fingers. Those who are able to trust themselves enough to risk the pain love can bring. I mean, hi, I'm a hopeless hopeless romantic, love means everything to me. But I'm careful with it. Because I'm afraid of being hurt. Who isn't? But, why are we?

The generic allergy to broken hearts. I think most of us have it. Let's get rid of it. I know that love is special, so why are we so terrified?

Why is it so hard?

We shouldn't be afraid. I think that being hurt happens, and we have to deal. But don't dwell. Refusing to realize that broken hearts are all (this is me being optimistic) mended. You're never going to fall in love with the same person twice. So if you lose someone, don't look for them. If it's really and truly lost love, then it's gone. It doesn't mean it wasn't there, but it does mean it is no longer present. And once you lose love, you don't want that same love back, because all you're going to remember is how you lost it.

So once you lose love, find new love.

Know that love knows no boundaries, and can't be defined or bottled. Love is an energy that cannot be exhausted.

There is always love. Always.

I think that by restricting yourself to avoid being hurt is the stupidest thing you can do. What doesn't kill you only makes you stronger. Nobody knows what love is. You can't google it, and your best friend or your mom can't tell you what it means. You are the only person who can define love for yourself. And each person you meet, and each person you love, is unique, you don't love anybody in the same way.

And if that's true, then we can't be afraid of getting hurt, because if we get hurt, it'll be different every time. Afraid of falling in love is like being afraid of eating breakfast. If you skip out on breakfast because you're scared, you're just going to eat more at lunch. Meaning... if you don't let yourself fall in love, because you're afraid of getting hurt, you're just going to end up hurting yourself more because you aren't letting yourself FEEL.

So, eat breakfast. And don't be scared of love because you're scared of getting hurt.

I can't tell you what falling in love means, and I can't tell you what being hurt feels like. You have to find out for yourself. You have to eat breakfast, or you will die.

hahaha just kidding that was a little extreme. But really, take some walls down and start to trust. Trust yourself, and trust the people you love. You will get hurt, but you will also fall in love. And I think the good in love outweighs everything bad that potentially comes with it.

So, life lesson today? LOVE! (eat breakfast)